America’s Additions: The Twelve Piranha States

by Ken West
BAMSouth.com Contributing Columnist

The only power any government has is the power to crack down on criminals. Well, when there aren’t enough criminals, one makes them. One declares so many things to be a crime that it becomes impossible for men to live without breaking laws.” —Ayn Rand, “Atlas Shrugged”

The right to be let alone is indeed the beginning of all freedom.”—Justice William O. Douglas

beingwatchedWhile many of us have been busy doing other things—like trying to earn an honest living—the United States has grown gluttonous for power. Most of us have been under the delusion that there are only fifty states in the Union. That assumption is wrong. There are now sixty-three States!

Twelve of the new states are hungry monsters. Let’s call them “Piranha States.” Fortunately, one other state can still save us from being eaten alive by the predators.

Let’s visit these new states, and see what we’re up against. Then we’ll visit the one good state that can save us. For your convenience, we’ve prepared the following fact sheet as we investigate each of the new areas:

The Surveillance State:
State Motto: “We’re watching you, and listening too—yes to YOU!”
State Capital: Somewhere in the Desert
Secret Mission: To know everything about everybody.
State Bird: Snooping Swoop
Main Products: Reams of records of every phone call, Tweet, Facebook posting, letter, post card, etc., etc., etc., and, Drones

The State of War:
State Motto: “Protecting the world from itself.”
State Capital: Everywhere on Planet Earth (plus a few undisclosed outposts in space)
Secret Mission: Find (or start) another war.
State Bird: Killer Hawk
Main Products: Foreign Wars; War on Terror; War on Drugs

The Regulatory State:
State Motto: “Regulate – Regulate – Regulate.”
State Capital: Washington, DC
Secret Mission: Regulate them ‘til they cry “Uncle Sam.”
State Bird: Pirouetting Parrot
Main Products: Regulations, directives, edicts, executive orders, mountain ranges of paper

The Nanny State:
State Motto: “We’ll wrap you little suckers in warm flannel and protect you from harming yourselves, ‘cause We, the Enlightened Ones, know best what’s good for you.”
State Capital: Mayor’s Office
Secret Mission: Control these ignoramuses.
State Bird: Brooding Hen
Main Products: Hot air, propaganda, and more regulations

Enforcement State:
State Motto: “One wrong move and we’ll nail your sorry ass to the wall.
State Capital: SWAT Team, U.S.A.
Secret Mission: Power.
State Bird: Sharp Shinned Hawk
Main Products: Battering rams, tanks, military tactics, brass knuckles, truncheons

The Bankrupt State:
State Motto: “We can’t afford a state motto, but we’ll pretend we can.”
State Capital: Washington, DC., U.S.A.
Secret Mission: Prevent anyone from noticing that we’re broke.
State Bird: Albatross
Main Products: Paper money, higher prices, more debt

The State of Taxation:
State Motto: “If it moves—tax it. If it makes money—tax it. If it’s dead—tax it to make sure.”
State Capitol: Wherever You Suckers Live, U.S.A.
Secret Mission: It’s no secret.
State Bird: Bone-stripping Vulture
Main Products: Tax audits, fear, uncertainty, bad economics.

The Bureaucratic State:
State Motto: “Let’s all be like the Post Office.”
State Capital: Every Nook & Cranny, U.S.A.
Secret Mission: Keep them waiting. Then, when they reach the front of the line, tell them they’re too late.
State Bird: Belligerent Buzzard
Main Products: Long lines, forms to fill out, more lines.

The Entitlement State:
State Motto: “So What if Medicare Bankrupts the Country. We’ll just pay the doctors less.”
State Capital: (We had to sell the farm.)
Secret Mission: ObamaCare for All
State Bird: Portly Pigeon
Main Products: Dependency and Bankruptcy

The Welfare State:
State Motto: “Food Stamps for All.”
State Capital: Detroit.
Secret Mission: Turn the country into a huge Detroit.
State Bird: Mooching Magpie
Main Products: Slums.

The State of Denial:
State Motto: “Ignore that we’re bankrupt, and keep spending money we don’t really have”
State Capital: Washington, DC
Secret Mission: Keep denying there’s a problem.
State Bird: The Oblivious Ostrich
Main Products: Excuses and denials.

The State of Uncertainty:
State Motto: “Keep them guessing—always.”
State Capital: Wherever, U.S.A.
Secret Mission: Even we don’t know what our secret mission is.
State Bird: Dodo Bird
Main Products: ObamaCare, and Unemployment.

Finally, we come to the one state that still has the power to save our assess from the other Piranha States. And it is…

The State of Awareness:
State Motto: “Learn what’s happening. Think.  Trust Yourself. Take action.”
State Capital: Wherever You Are, and willing to question authority
Secret Mission: (That’s our secret.)
State Bird: The Eagle
Main Products: The Matrix Gazette; Knowledge, Thought and Action; Intellectual Ammunition, including the great books and documents of liberty.

In the meantime, start spending more time in the great State of Awareness. You don’t need to go far because you’re already there. Welcome. Let’s get busy.

“If you want total security, go to prison. There you’re fed, clothed, given medical care and so on. The only thing lacking… is freedom.”—Dwight D. Eisenhower

Ken West

Ken West

Contributing Writer
Ken West is a writer and speaker focused on helping individuals achieve a successful, balanced, and productive life. Ken, a former paratrooper who served in Vietnam, is the author of Get What You Want. He is past president of a chapter of the National Speakers Association, and founder of Better Grip Media LLC. Currently, Ken is the project manager for an international training and consulting firm in south Florida.
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